Good Stuff

Tips, tricks and techniques that help you explore and enjoy your communication awareness.

Quote of the Day

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.
-Doug Larson
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Dear Jane

Dear Jane

This year I resolve to make some changes at work.  I’m tired of people ignoring my ideas, and asking me to do things that they should be doing themselves, and doing things badly.  But whenever I tell people what they’re doing wrong, it just makes things worse.  Help me get these people straightened out!

Thanks,

Not the boss

Dear Not the Boss,

I understand how frustrating it can be when others don’t seem to understand your messages.  Maybe you are framing the problems in ways that upset others; try framing the situations in terms of what you need, and what you are able to do.  I find that we can’t change others- we can just change how we interact with them. And I try not to use a bark unless it is really necessary.

Good luck,

Your friend, Jane

Tip of the Day

Using Fewer and Less

If you can count it, use fewer.

- Fewer meetings

- Fewer people

- Fewer issues

Otherwise, use less.

- less. drama.

Spotlight

Assertiveness is needed!  Do you have a right to say what you want or need, or to tell someone that you are uncomfortable, or that you want a behavior to stop?  Of course you do.  What probably stops most people from doing these things is the fear that they will make the other person angry, and that the situation can become worse.  The key to assertiveness is to make your statements in ways that maintain your dignity and integrity and don’t harm or attack the other person.  A quick guide is this:  Begin your sentence with “I”, rather than with ‘you’.  Saying “I don’t want you to speak to me that way; it makes me uncomfortable” is assertive.  Saying “You sound like a bully when you say that and you have to stop.” is aggressive.

You can do this.  Call us at 202-298-7700 for help.